Hey,
After all the hoopla about prop-8 and its passing, I just wanted to take a moment (or two, or five) to write and reach out to you from the other side of the issue. I've been reading up on the fall-out and such and I agree that being divisive will not help the gay cause at all. Rather, I'd like to take the time to help you understand what the other perspective is.
The essence of the matter is this (I'll bullet-point it to make it brief and, hopefully, somewhat interesting):
- As a human being with certain inalienable rights endowed by the US Constitution, adults are allowed to do whatever they choose to do (barring the harming of someone else or their property) in their pursuit of happiness. I hope you're still with me on this.
- As a Christian, we are taught to love our neighbors as we would love ourselves and as we would love Jesus Christ. Who are we to condemn or punish or otherwise dehumanize someone for what we think or feel (as opposed to know) is wrong? No one should be able to judge another human but his or her maker. And to judge someone because of who they love is unfair and unchristian.
- Gay people do not choose to be gay. Even if they do, refer to the previous bullet points. (1) People have the inalienable right to pursue their own happiness, as long as they're not hurting anyone else. (2) As Christians, we're supposed to love people, not judge them and condemn them. If you put yourself in the shoes of a gay person - really put yourself in their shoes - you would see that America in spite of all its "liberties" is still very biased against gays. Why would someone choose to make themselves a second-class citizen? That doesn't make any sense. And it's cruel to perpetuate the lie that you can un-gay someone. Imagine being told - EVERYDAY OF YOUR LIFE - that the person that you love is WRONG WRONG WRONG. Imagine never being happy in a relationship. Ever. I don't want to live like that, and I don't think anyone should have to.Those are my points, and I hope you'll consider them. Here are a few more comments (from a Mormon woman), that I would like to point out as well:
I realize the people who present the "moral issue" argument do believe
that gay rights are, in fact, an exclusively moral issue. Perhaps for
their religious community, homosexuality is an exclusively religious
issue. I recognize their perspective, but I disagree. I don't care if
the people in question are gay, white, black, straight, tall, short, or
purple, they are being denied fundamental rights. In my America, all
citizens are equal under the law. In my America, I won't stand for it.
I will not look my gay friends in the eye and tell them they don't
deserve happiness, that their families don't deserve safety and
security, that their love isn't the right kind of love. Not in my
America. Not in my name.
Because of my religious faith, because of my absolute insistence that
all people are equal, because of our shared humanity, I hold inviolate
the rights that will secure to each individual - gay and straight - the
free exercise of their conscience, the right to property, and the
protection of their life. To add one more caveat, as Jefferson did, the
right to happiness is also inviolate to me. All (wo)men. Period. All
(wo)men are created equal. Period. All (wo)men are created equal and
endowed by their creator with certain unalienable rights. Period. It
took our country a while to figure out those sacred words included
women, but we eventually figured it out. It also took our country a
while to figure out those sacred words included ethnic minorities, but
we eventually figured it out. I pray we eventually figure out how
bigoted our treatment of the GLBT community has been and continues to
be.
{ http://mymadeleines.blogspot.com/2008/11/how-do-i-reconcile.html }
The bottom line is this: by not allowing gay marriage, we're essentially treating citizens differently and stripping legal rights from a minority group. This is not the first time that this country has done this, and this will not be the last if we keep this up. And I'm optimistic that people will be more accepting of those who are different from them. Someday, they won't consider someone's gender, race, nationality, sexual orientation, or age as the main defining factor of who they are, but they'll actually get to know the person. And just like how inter-racial marriage was considered a huge no-no not more than 50 years ago, I'm confident that our society will become more tolerant, understanding, open, and loving in the future. And we'll all look back at this and wonder what the hell we were thinking.
I really don't want to live in a country/state/city where people around me are intolerant of other people. Sure, you may not like it, but it's their prerogative and they should be free to do as they please. Legally-speaking. And vice-versa, they should not be intolerant of what you do with your life. It works both ways.
I like you, and I don't like the idea of me not trying to help you see beyond church doctrine. God is one thing, church propaganda is another, often created by mankind to serve a particular group's agenda. Let's boil it down. Seriously, what would Jesus do if he were alive today? Judge and condemn the gays?
Let me suggest it outright: The vast majority of Yes on 8 voters
seem to have been motivated, at least in part, by this sad
misunderstanding of God, this harsh spiritual slant that supports a
discriminatory, micromanager Almighty who fully endorses marital bliss,
but only for some.
(Interestingly, I believe this is the same God who, until
recently, didn't allow whites to marry blacks. Or women to vote. Or
slaves to be free. Or people to get divorced. Or women to become
priests. Or humans to wear condoms. Hmm.)
Then again, when you put it that way, the ugly fight for Prop. 8
makes perfect sense. After all, hetero marriage is all organized
religion really has left, their last vestige of power and control.
Everything else they fought so hard to inject into the national agenda
-- intelligent design, God's war against Muslims, the end of
reproductive choice, more prayer in schools, abstinence education, et
al -- not only failed, but failed spectacularly. No wonder they're
clinging to this rigid, outdated idea of marriage so violently.
...I do not blame God. I blame a very gloomy, revisionist version
of the divine, a sour and demeaning mindset that believes in
restriction, constriction, dread.
The good news is, I think Prop. 8's desperate, last-gasp
victory merely reveals that this hollow, homophobic version of God is
waning, sliding, fighting for its last taste of relevance, soon to be
replaced by something just a bit more dynamic and open-hearted and,
well, truly divine.
The bad news is, it's just going to take a bit longer than we'd hoped.
{ http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/g/a/2008/11/07/notes110708.DTL }
Thoughtfully,
Chung
__________
I wrote this email to a friend after the passage of Prop. 8 but I never got around to actually emailing it, thinking, really, what would it help? Well, time to clear out my Drafts folder so, Internet, here it is.
